I would love it if you would join me in this link up! It’s just a simple little way to share a piece of your heart, something you’ve learned along your own journey in life, or grace that your finding along your way. I can’t wait to read your post! (And don’t forget to snag a badge 🙂
Bot Bot turns 13 today. I am officially the mother of a teenager, which is a little surreal considering I’ve only been at this parenting thing for 5 years. I’m not ready for it. I haven’t been ready for it. And not in just the typical way that a mom says she’s not prepared for her child to grow up. Though that is part of it. But it’s really more about the fact that I haven’t had the time to get used to the idea. The other night at dinner we were all gathered round the table, even the baby-in his Bumbo seat- and the hubs started talking about when the little one would be joining in on the dinner menu. Spaghetti was the main course and he started describing how it wouldn’t be long before our little man would be in his chair, spaghetti in his hair and all over his face, and we would take him straight from the table to the bath. It would only be a few short months. Then he turned to his right and looked at our daughter, on the cusp of adulthood and remarked that it would only be five years before she was out of the house and off to college.
Five years. She’s only been mine for five years. And I couldn’t help but think how quickly that time has gone, and how much I have missed along the way. Those first eight years she spent growing into the person she would be, and we didn’t get to see it. And now, she sits on the edge of the world, looking into all that is possible in the future, and it is exciting and breathtaking, and for her mamma, terrifying, all in one. I remember what it was like to be young. Though she may think the opposite, it hasn’t been all that long since I walked in those shoes, though my shoe of choice was Doc Martins instead of Converse. But I shared her love of music and painting my nails. I too experimented with my hair, to some benefit and some demise (ahem, I may not have been alone in burning my bangs off. You know who you are 😉 My friends were my life force, and the cute boy down the street the drive behind our sleep over drama, just as it is with her.
And yet so much is different. The internet was just starting to take it’s hold when I entered my teen years, whereas now you can’t get away from the web, Facebook or Twitter. Kids have so much more access to so many more things than my peers and I had ever thought possible, all at the swipe of their fingers. And trying to keep your child safe has traveled beyond teaching stranger danger to becoming the Gestapo of the internet. But I know I can’t protect her from everything.
I know that there are things that will slip by me, and she’ll have a choice to make. I know that the risks of my youth are multiplied ten-fold for the generation of my daughter. So I try to keep an open dialogue of conversation, in the hope that she knows she can come to me over any question or situation. And I pray. I pray that the values I am hoping to ingrain in her spring forth when she’s confronted with a questionable situation. I pray that she has the strength to follow her heart in this sea of bullies and emotional abuse that is middle school. I pray that she is sheltered from the worst of the storm in this world, and that when she sees those tossed in the waves of chaos that is this world, that her heart is filled with compassion. But most of all, I pray that she has hope, and peace, and the joy that comes with knowing she has been afforded a grace and pardon beyond compare should she only accept it. And in the end, that’s really all I can do.